Wednesday, December 15, 2010

all I want

Driving home the other night I came across a confused man and his wife sitting in their car at the gate entrance that accesses our little neighborhood. The man, driving a nice model sedan, rolled down his window and looked at me with a confused expression that spoke louder than if he had waved me down with jumbo glow sticks. I rolled down my window and inquired if he needed help. He asked if I knew how to get to a certain road in the neighborhood. At that demand, I fumbled about in my brain trying to find out where I had compartmentalized "Grouse Ln." But, I had been taken off guard and thus my efforts were futile. Of course I did not offer him the dainty little fact that I've lived here for 12 years and that I really should know where this street named after a ground dwelling fowl was. Instead, I simply said, "Well, I'm not sure right now. It's as if you're asking me what I want for Christmas, and no one ever seems to know what they want on the spot." He understood and probably continued configuring his GPS. One minute later, pulling into our driveway, I remember where that old Grouse was located- just two roads down from ours.

This all goes to saying that it's Christmastime again (though, it never quite feels like it until the day after), and I am undergoing the annual barrage of "Ah, dearest sister/daughter/friend, what do you want for Christmas?" Just like the Grouse Ln. question, this one is asked in on-the-spot futility. It is as though that question is a magical curse shot from the wand of Hermione; once uttered it wipes the mind of the responder and stymies any other useful response but that of "I don't need anything" or the classic "I'll think about it" (which one never does). Then, on December 26th the spell breaks and the flood of all things your heart truly aspired to unwrapping Christmas morning breaks forth. You then, in the days after, end up abusing your already waning wallet (because now you realize that you actually did need something) while returning those gifts that people bought while you were not "thinking about it."

Though, in all reality, I really do not need anything this Christmas I am still completing the inventory of my assets as to locate any possible vacancies that need to be filled (translation: I am thinking about it). Here are a few things that you might consider getting me for Christmas. By the way, world peace comes with free wrapping.



monthly, scheduled visits from General Authorities
or a 2011 subscription to the Liahona in French


a gold plated, diamond-encrusted macbookor, a couple of my favorite pens: Pilot V7 in black
a roundtrip flight to New Caledonia
or, international postage stamps so at least my letters can take a vacation to New Caledonia

you choose.
oh, and I could use a new journal.
that's all.

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